Submitted by: Dr.Suzanna Smith, Associate Professor, Human Development
When I was growing up, my family ate together almost every night. We came together at the end of a busy day to enjoy a meal and, especially, to share each other’s company.It was a good time for my parents to check in on what was happening in school, activities, and friendships.During my active teenage years, the predictable family dinner was sometimes the only calm period of the day. It was a welcome relief from the pressures of high school life.
Today, research confirms that family meals can be an important time to develop strong family relationships. And, for teenagers, family mealtime is connected to positive behaviors. “Teens who regularly [and frequently] haves meals with their family are less likely to get into fights, think about suicide, smoke, drink, [or] use drugs,” (Child Trends, 2005, p. 1) and they are more likely to do better in school.
Yet, during adolescence, teens “tend to spend less time with the family and eat more meals away from home” (Child Trends, 2005, p.1). A recently released report from Child Trends found that in 2003, less than half of adolescents, 42%, at a meal as a family 6-7 days a week.
A number of factors affect whether families dine together often.
One is nativity. Foreign-born adolescents are more likely than native-born teens to eat meals with their families 6-7 times a week (62% vs. 40%)
Another is ethnicity. Hispanic adolescents and children are more likely than white and black teens and children to eat together 6-7 times a week (54% vs. 40%).
Age is relevant: Older teens are less likely than younger teens and children to eat with their families.
Poverty and education also matter. Adolescents living in poverty are more likely than others to eat family meals 6-7 times a week. Teens whose parents have less than a high school degree are more likely to eat together as a family.
Although parents claim that busy schedules conflict with family meals, teenagers say it’s not only conflicting schedules that keep them away from the dinner table, but also that they want to be independent, don’t like the food, or are dissatisfied with family relations.
There are benefits for families dining together. So, if you want to bring your teenager back to the dinner table, consider involving them in meal planning and serving meals they like. Allow some meals away from home, with and without parents, but also plan for plenty of family meal times.
Finally, make meal times pleasant. Turn your attention to the family by turning off the television and cell phones; let the answering machine take telephone messages during the meal. Instead of arguing or reprimanding your children, use this time as a chance to enjoy family togetherness.
Discuss topics of interest to the whole family. Encourage discussion by asking each family member what he or she liked best during the day. Give each family member, even the youngest, a chance to contribute to the conversation, with everyone paying attention.
References
Child Trends Data Bank (2005). Family meals. Washington DC: Author. Retrieved October 18, 2005 from http://www.childtrendsdatabank.org/indicators/96FamilyMeals.cfm
Bobroff, L. B. & Davis, D. (2004). The importance of family meals. Family Album Radio, WUFT-FM, Gainesville, FL. Aired.4/17/2004.
