I grew up in a family where, as children, my siblings and I would NEVER consider approaching our parents to talk about certain topics. We never discussed money, and I couldn’t fathom having a conversation about sex with my parents. These issues were simply taboo.

However, researchers continue to reveal the importance of open communication between children and their parents, that is, IF parents want to impart their values on their children and attempt to influence the decisions they make as they mature. Positive communication and active listening are keys to keeping the channels open between parents and their children.

According to experts with the non-profit organization Advocates for Youth, research has shown “that youth with the least accurate information about sexuality and sexual risk behaviors may experiment more and at earlier ages compared to youth who have more information.” Teens also report that they want to discuss sex, relationships and sexual health with their parents. However, many parents aren’t very “askable.”

It’s common for adults feel that they may not have the right words or answers or they may be concerned that their children don’t think they’re “with it.” They might also fear giving too much or too little information and worry about when it’s appropriate to share that information.

However, being an askable parent will open the doors for closer relationships with your children and to family connections. It may take some adjusting and a little practice, but learning how to talk WITH your children, with confidence, can also help to protect them in the long haul.

Listening, learning and living together, it’s the science of life. “Family Album” is a co-production of University of Florida IFAS Extension, the Department of Family, Youth and Community Sciences and of WUFT-FM. If you’d like to learn more, please visit our website at familyalbumradio.org.

Podcast: Are you an “askable” parent?
Written by Donna Z. Davis
Reviewed by Suzanna Smith

References:

Huberman, B. & Alford, S. (2005), “Are you an askable parent?” Advocates for Youth. Retrieved on November 19, 2006.

Having a baby challenges couples with many changes in their routines and relationship. In a matter of hours, a family goes from an adult couple whose life often revolves around their own interests, to a three-person family with a little one requiring twenty-four hour care. I remember one of my friends exclaiming when she found she was pregnant, “I’ll need to tap into my friend and family networks for help!”

And, research supports her intuition. Couples’ social networks can help new mothers and fathers adjust to parenthood. In the Journal of Marriage and Family, researchers reported that new parents with largerfamilynetworks were better adjusted—they were positive about life, enjoyed others, and got involved in activities, even during the busy and demanding transition to parenthood.

Having supportive friends also helped ease the adjustment to parenthood, especially for women. Those new mothers who had satisfying friendships as well as family relationships were less likely to be depressed.

The support that husbands and wives offered each other was also important. Those who reported more give and take with their spouses were less depressed. Unfortunately, both husbands and wives became less satisfied with their spouse’s support over the two-year period.

All these findings suggest that “support from close family members” is very important during the transition to the birth of a child because this support protects against postpartum depression and related problems (p;. 527, 528). New mothers and fathers do need support as they take on their new roles and responsibilities as parents. Reaching out to family, friends, and each other can help make this transition easier.

Listening, learning and living together, it’s the science of life. “Family Album” is a co-production of University of Florida IFAS Extension, the Department of Family, Youth and Community Sciences and of WUFT-FM. If you’d like to learn more, please visit our website at familyalbumradio.org.

Podcast: Social Networks and New Parents
Written by Suzanna Smith
Reviewed by Donna Z. Davis

Reference

Bost, K.K., Cox, M. J. & Payne, C. (2002). Structural and supportive changes in couples’ family and friendship networks across the transition to parenthood. Journal of Marriage and Family, 64, 517-531.

Just a few days after our first child was born, our pediatrician informed us that our son needed to go back into the hospital to spend a night under the bilirubin lights for his jaundice. In an attempt to cheer me up, my husband took me to a new comedy playing at the local theater. I cried through the entire movie--and for the next three days. The veteran moms in my life told me not to worry, that it was just my “raging hormones.”

In fact, they were right. I was experiencing what is often referred to as the “baby blues,” which are considered a normal part of early motherhood and can last several days. However, when the mood swings, depression, loss of appetite, difficulty sleeping and even a loss of interest or pleasure in life persists for weeks or even months, these moms are likely suffering from postpartum depression.

According to researchers at the Yale University School of Medicine, postpartum major depression occurs in about one of 10 childbearing women. If left untreated, postpartum depression can have serious adverse effects on the mother and on her relationship with significant others, as well as on her baby's emotional and psychological development.

If a new mother experiences signs of depression, she should talk with her doctor about her symptoms and possible solutions. The doctor may recommend counseling, medication or other support tools. However, nursing mothers should also be aware of the possible effect antidepressants can have on breast milk. Most important, new mothers don’t need to try to navigate these changes alone—it’s important to turn to family and friends for help during this important life transition.

Listening, learning and living together, it’s the science of life. “Family Album” is a co-production of University of Florida IFAS Extension, the Department of Family, Youth and Community Sciences and of WUFT-FM. If you’d like to learn more, please visit our website at familyalbumradio.org.

Podcast: The “baby blues” and postpartum depression
Written by Donna Z. Davis
Reviewed by Suzanna Smith

Sources:

“Postpartum Depression and the "Baby Blues:” Are changes in mood common after childbirth?” American Family Physician, April, 1999. Retrieved on October 31, 2006 online. “This handout provides a general overview on this topic and may not apply to everyone. To find out if this handout applies to you and to get more information on this subject, talk to your family doctor.”

Epperson, C. Neill, M.D., “Postpartum Major Depression: Detection and Treatment” Yale University School of Medicine, American Family Physician, April, 1999. Retrieved on October 31, 2006 online.

In previous years, taxpayers could choose to have their refund direct deposited in their checking or savings account or they could have opted for a paper check mailed to their address. Starting this year, taxpayers can opt to send their refund to three different accounts -such as a checking, savings and retirement accounts.

The idea behind split refunds is to encourage people to increase their savings or retirement account balances. In order to take advantage of the split refund option, taxpayers must use Form 888. This is a simple form that tax filers use to tell how they would like their refund split and the account numbers to which the funds should be deposited. Form 888 is then attached to your 1040 form. Tax filers who want their refund direct deposited into only one account do not need to file Form 888.

Refunds directed into savings and checking accounts usually arrive within two – five weeks. Hopefully, the short turn around time of refunds will help consumers avoid rapid refund anticipation loans. These types of loans can come with high interest rates.

For more information visit the IRS website at www.irs.gov.

Contributed by: Dr. Jo Turner, Professor, Family and Consumer Economics.

Sources:

Internal Revenue Service Publications - Splitting Federal Income Tax Refunds and Government to Stop Collecting Long - Distance Telephone Tax